A Guide for Parents and Caregivers
While this time of year can be exciting and full of possibility, it can also be stressful and overwhelming for teens.
The pressure to achieve academically, perform well on standardized tests, secure extracurricular achievements, and craft the perfect application essays can leave them feeling anxious and uncertain about their future.
As a parent or caregiver, your support can make a world of difference in helping your teen navigate the college prep season with confidence and balance.
Here are some strategies to provide that crucial support in the college prep season:
1. Be a Source of Encouragement, Not Pressure
Often, parents may unintentionally place excessive pressure on their children to get into a “top-tier” school or achieve specific academic milestones. This can lead to burnout and even resentment.
Instead, focus on supporting their individual goals and interests.
Be genuinely curious about their aspirations and remind them that success isn’t defined by any single test score or college acceptance letter. Acknowledge their hard work and commitment, regardless of the outcome.
Tip: When talking about college, avoid comparing their progress to that of their peers. Every teen’s journey is unique, and comparisons can lead to unnecessary stress.
2. Help Create a Structured Plan
- Start by helping them break down the process into manageable chunks.
- Create a timeline that includes deadlines for college applications, standardized tests, and any other required materials.
- Encourage them to work backwards from these deadlines and set mini-goals along the way.
- Check-in regularly to offer guidance and celebrate small wins.
Tip: Use a shared calendar or digital task manager to stay organized and keep everyone on track. This can also help your teen feel a sense of accomplishment as they complete each step.
3. Assist with Research, But Let Them Lead
Help your teen gather a list of potential schools by looking up programs, campus cultures, and financial aid opportunities. But remember, it’s essential to allow your teen to take the lead in narrowing down their choices.
After all, this is their future, and they should feel ownership of their decision-making process.
Tip: Encourage your teen to visit campuses (if possible) or attend virtual tours to get a true feel for the schools they’re considering. This will help them make a more informed decision about what environment aligns with their academic and personal goals.
4. Support Emotional Well-Being
Your teen is facing a lot of pressure, and they may experience feelings of self-doubt, anxiety, or even fear of failure.
It’s essential that you create a space where they can express their feelings openly and without judgment.
Be sure to have regular check-ins to ask how they’re doing—not just academically, but emotionally. Encourage them to practice self-care and prioritize mental health. Help them find balance by incorporating relaxation or recreational activities into their daily routine. This might include going for walks, doing yoga, hanging out with friends or simply taking time to unwind.
Tip: If you notice signs of anxiety or depression, it might be helpful to consult with a counselor or therapist. Many high schools offer mental health resources, and there’s no harm in seeking additional support if needed.
5. Foster Open Communication About Finances
The cost of tuition, housing, and other expenses can seem overwhelming.
It’s important to have open, honest conversations with your teen about financial matters.
Discuss your family’s budget, potential scholarships, and financial aid options. You can even help them explore work-study programs or other ways to reduce the financial burden of college.
Tip: Encourage your teen to apply for as many scholarships as possible, even those that may seem small. Many scholarships have little competition and can add up over time.
6. Help Them Find Balance
This might include keeping up with extracurricular activities, continuing to pursue personal hobbies, and spending time with friends and family. Focusing solely on the college process can lead to burnout and a loss of perspective.
Encourage your teen to stay involved in activities they enjoy. Whether it’s sports, music, volunteer work, or simply hanging out with friends, maintaining these connections will not only provide relief from stress but will also make for a more well-rounded application.
Tip: Remind them that colleges are looking for students who are passionate and engaged, not just those who excel academically. Personal fulfillment and well-being are just as important as academic success.
7. Encourage Reflection and Self-Discovery
Support them in thinking about what kind of college experience they want. (Also, be open to the idea that college may not be the experience they want/need. There is a growing movement towards trade schools that allow for movement into the working world much sooner. Listen to this podcast from 1000 Hours Outside Podcast if you’re interested in learning more.)
What kind of community do they want to be a part of? Do they want a large university or a smaller liberal arts school?
This reflection process will not only help them make a more informed decision about where to apply but will also support their long-term growth and development.
Tip: Remind them that colleges are looking for students who are passionate and engaged, not just those who excel academically. Personal fulfillment and well-being are just as important as academic success.
8. Celebrate the Small Wins
Whether it’s submitting a college essay, finishing a challenging standardized test, or simply completing a week’s worth of tasks, take time to acknowledge your teen’s efforts and achievements along the way.
Positive reinforcement will help them stay motivated and feel supported throughout the process.
Tip: Make celebrations fun and personalized—whether it’s a family dinner, a movie night, or even a simple congratulatory note. The recognition of their hard work goes a long way.
Supporting your teen through the college prep season requires patience, understanding, and a balance of encouragement and space.
By being an emotional anchor, helping them stay organized, and encouraging their self-reflection, you’ll equip them to face the challenges ahead with confidence and resilience.
Remember, the college application process is just one step in a long and exciting journey. While it may feel like the culmination of years of hard work, it’s also just the beginning of your teen’s next chapter. Stay positive, stay involved, and most importantly, stay compassionate.
Nino Elliott
Executive Director
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Nino Elliott | Executive Director
Nino is the Executive Director for Teen Life, driven by a deep passion for supporting and empowering teens. With a Bachelor’s in Youth and Family Ministry and a Master’s in Marriage and Family Therapy from Abilene Christian University along with time spent working as a pastor and as a fundraiser, he brings a wealth of knowledge and experience to Teen Life. Committed to fostering positive relationships and creating meaningful programs, Nino is dedicated to helping young people navigate life's challenges and discover their potential.