The Unexpected Loss of a Parent with Malaya Bizaillion

The Unexpected Loss of a Parent with Malaya Bizaillion

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We all dread the unexpected – we worry, plan, and avoid it at all costs.

In the first episode of this series, we are talking to Malaya Bizaillion about life after the unexpected happens. At just 9 years old, Malaya lost her mom, Jenny Ross Bizaillion, following an unexpected illness that took her life only 19 days after going to the hospital. Now as a graduating senior in high school, Malaya shares her story with grace and wisdom. Malaya gives hope in the midst of loss and is an incredible voice for teenagers who are living life in the midst of the expected burden of loss.

We talk about grief, heavenly birthdays, grace, and how adults can be helpful.

If you have experienced the loss of parent, or are walking through life with a teen who has a similar experience, this is the podcast for you! We invite you to join our conversation with Malaya Bizaillion.

 

Resources:

In this episode, we mentioned the following resources:

Have a question?

If you have a question about something you heard or just want to give us some feedback, please leave us a comment below.  We would love to hear from you!
Karlie Duke
Karlie Duke

Communications Director

Chris Robey
Chris Robey

Former CEO

Malaya Bizaillion

Malaya Bizaillion

Special Guest

The 5 “A’s” of Connection

The 5 “A’s” of Connection

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In this episode of the Stay Calm, Don’t Panic! Podcast, Chris Robey is joined by Beverly Ross to discuss how we can increase our connection with teenagers. Beverly offers five easy ways to get better at connecting with others. As an expert in the counseling realm, Beverly’s wisdom is invaluable! Let’s work on making our homes, classrooms, and churches safe places for connection.

There should be more a voice of gratitude in my home than a voice of correction.
Beverly Ross

In this episode, Beverly Ross discusses increased connection with others through…

  1. Attention
  2. Appreciation
  3. Affection
  4. Affirmation
  5. Acceptance

Ask yourself…

  • Am I being fully present?
  • Am I being more appreciative of myself so I can appreciate others?
  • How can I better show gratitude and focus on the good in teenagers?

Go ask a teen…

  • When are the times that you feel I am not present?
  • When do you feel appreciated by me? How can I better show when I appreciate you?

In this episode, we mention or use the following resources on connecting with others.

Have a question?

If you have a question about something you heard or just want to give us some feedback, please leave us a comment below.  We would love to hear from you!

Karlie Duke
Karlie Duke

Communications Director

Chris Robey
Chris Robey

Former CEO

Beverly Ross

Beverly Ross

Special Guest

The Power of “Me Too”

The Power of “Me Too”

Earlier this week, we held our 2nd annual Teen Lifeline Fundraising Dinner & Auction, and I am still blown away by the generosity and support that come from this night. One of my favorite parts of the night came when Beverly Ross spoke truth over the audience.

If you haven’t heard of Beverly Ross or Wise County Christian Counseling, I would encourage you to go check them out!

At this dinner, Beverly Ross challenged us by saying, “We need to teach our children that it’s not going to be okay. It’s going to be hard, but you’re never going to do it alone.”

Until she said this, I had never thought about the danger of saying, “It’s going to be okay!” When little kids are upset, we tell them it will be okay. When someone dies, we say that it will be okay eventually. In those teenage years, we talk about their future and that everything will be better – friends, parent relationships, school, drama, their purpose…the list could go on and on.

But can we guarantee that everything will be okay? That things will get better?

We cannot promise that their life will be perfect or happy or even “okay,” but we can promise the teenagers around us that when it gets hard, when life is less than okay, that they will have someone to walk with them. They are not alone. They don’t have to struggle by themselves.

This is the power of Teen Lifeline Support Groups! More than anything, they provide a safe place for teenagers to talk about things that are both okay and not okay. They give perspective and understanding for other people’s struggles. They make sure that every teen participating has at least one adult and a group of peers to do life with.

As Beverly said, there are few words more powerful than “me too!” In the midst of pain, heartache, struggles, questions and life in general, teenagers need to be surrounded by others who can say, “Me too!”

“Me too” implies understanding and acceptance.

Think back to your teenage years. Did you ever feel alone, different, lost? What would have happened if someone had looked you in the eye and said, “Me too.”

Let’s stop making empty promises to our children. Telling them that it’s going to be okay is not helpful for anyone when you can’t actually guarantee what their future is going to look like. What is helpful is giving them a chance to meet and be encouraged by others who understand what they are going through. No fixing is required. You don’t have to have all of the answers, but take the time to listen and respond with, “Me too.”

So, what do you think? How has the phrase, “Me too,” impacted your life? What can we say instead of, “It’s going to be okay?” Share your thoughts and stories with us!

Karlie Duke was in one of Teen Lifeline’s original support groups and now is our Communications Director. She is passionate about encouraging students to live better stories.
Don’t Panic about Grief with Beverly Ross

Don’t Panic about Grief with Beverly Ross

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Grief comes in many different forms, but it is something everyone deals with at some point in life. In this episode, Chris and Karlie are joined by Beverly Ross to talk about the basics of grief, what to expect from a grieving teenager, and how we can better support teens who are grieving.

Don’t panic about grief, there is a way to bring hope and encouragement to difficult circumstances!

It takes courage & bravery to stand with someone in pain – step into what’s uncomfortable.
Beverly Ross

In this episode, you’ll find out…

  • Some of the unique ways teenagers deal with grief.
  • Advice about what can be said or done to better walk alongside a teen experiencing grief.
  • Signs that a teen might need to seek help from a professional.
  • Examples of grief-producers, especially for teenagers.
  • How to use the acronym PERS (Physical, Emotional, Relational, Spiritual) to positively cope with grief.
  • Ways we as a community can surround and encourage those who are grieving.

Ask yourself…

  • Am I putting too much pressure on myself to do or say the perfect thing?
  • Could this teenager be talking to someone else if they aren’t talking to me?
  • Am I aware of important dates that I need to remember and recognize?

Go ask a teen…

  • What do you need?
  • What is it like for you right now? Tell me your story.
  • What would you like to do for holidays? How would you like to hold space?

Resources on grief you might like

Have a question?

If you have a question about something you heard or just want to give us some feedback, please leave us a comment below.  We would love to hear from you!
Karlie Duke
Karlie Duke

Communications Director

Chris Robey
Chris Robey

Former CEO

Beverly Ross

Beverly Ross

Special Guest