Staying Mentally Healthy While Working with Teens

Staying Mentally Healthy While Working with Teens

How to protect your mental health as youth workers, mentors, parents, and teachers

Working with teens can be one of the most rewarding experiences — and also one of the most challenging.

To maintain good mental health while supporting teens, it’s important to prioritize self-care, establish healthy boundaries, and seek help when you need it. Creating a safe, supportive environment for teens to share their thoughts and feelings can make a huge difference. (Read: Clear boundaries are better for everyone!)

At the same time, keeping an eye on your own stress levels and making time to recharge through relaxing activities is key.

Here’s a closer look at how you can stay mentally healthy while working with teens:

1. Prioritize Self-Care

Set Boundaries:

It’s easy to blur the lines between your personal life and your work with teens, but setting clear boundaries is essential. Protect your downtime so you can return to your role with renewed energy and compassion. Remember: you can’t pour from an empty cup.

Practice Self-Compassion:

You’re only human. Acknowledge your own feelings, frustrations, and needs. Give yourself grace, and know it’s okay to ask for help. Taking care of your emotional health isn’t a luxury — it’s a necessity.

Engage in Activities You Enjoy:

Make space in your schedule for activities that bring you joy, whether it’s reading, hiking, painting, or playing music. These hobbies aren’t just fun; they’re powerful tools for managing stress and keeping your spirits high.

Seek Support:

Don’t underestimate the value of a good support system. Regular check-ins with friends, family, or a therapist can provide emotional release, new perspectives, and encouragement when challenges arise.

2. Foster a Supportive Environment for Teens

Create a Safe Space:

Teens are much more likely to open up when they feel safe and accepted. Strive to create an environment that is non-judgmental, welcoming, and affirming of their experiences.

Active Listening:

Really listen — not just to the words teens say, but to the feelings behind them. Make eye contact, nod, and reflect back what you’re hearing. Validating a teen’s experience builds trust and helps them feel truly heard.

Empathy and Understanding:

Step into their shoes. Teens face a unique set of challenges that may seem minor to adults but feel monumental to them. Showing empathy can deepen your connection and foster mutual respect.

Encourage Problem-Solving:

Rather than jumping in to fix every problem, support teens in finding their own solutions. This not only empowers them but also helps them build resilience and critical thinking skills.

3. Be Mindful of Your Own Well-Being

Recognize Stress:

Pay attention to warning signs like fatigue, irritability, or trouble concentrating. These can be signals that it’s time to slow down and prioritize your own mental health.

Manage Stress:

Incorporate relaxation techniques into your routine, like deep breathing exercises, meditation, or yoga. Even a few minutes a day can make a meaningful difference in calming your mind and re-centering your energy.

Seek Professional Help:

If you’re finding it hard to manage stress or emotional struggles on your own, reaching out to a therapist or counselor is a strong and healthy choice. Remember, caring for yourself allows you to care for others more effectively.

4. Encourage Healthy Habits in Teens

Promote Healthy Routines:

Help teens establish routines that prioritize sleep, nutrition, exercise, and downtime. Consistency in these areas can greatly impact their mood and ability to cope with challenges.

Model Positive Behaviors:

Your actions speak louder than words. When teens see you setting boundaries, practicing self-care, and seeking help when needed, they learn to do the same.

Educate on Mental Health:

Openly talk about mental health, why it matters, and how to spot the signs of a mental health challenge. The more we normalize these conversations, the more empowered teens will feel to seek help if they need it.

Protecting your mental health isn’t selfish; it’s smart.

By protecting your own mental health, you can create a more supportive and nurturing environment for the teens you work with. Taking care of yourself isn’t just good for you; it’s one of the best things you can do for the teens who look up to you.

Kelly Fann
Kelly Fann

Digital Media Manager

More Resources You Might Like

How to Help A Teenager with Anxiety
Episode 103 Anxiety & Gap Years
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Recognizing Burnout in Teens

Recognizing Burnout in Teens

How can mentors, teachers, and parents recognize burnout and help teens overcome it?

With the start of a new semester, the pressure of college admissions, homework routines, social problems, and new seasons in sports can weigh heavy on teenagers. Even after the break, rounding the corner on another half of the school year can feel insurmountable to anyone!

In fact, burnout isn’t just an adult problem. Teens can experience it too.

And it’s important for the caring adults in their lives to recognize the signs and provide support. Burnout in teens often looks a little different than it does in adults, so staying informed can help you spot the early warning signs and take action.

What is teenage burnout?

Burnout occurs when prolonged stress overwhelms a person’s ability to cope. For teens, this stress might come from schoolwork, extracurricular activities, social pressures, or even home responsibilities. Unlike temporary stress, burnout is persistent and can significantly impact a teen’s emotional and physical well-being.

Common Signs of Burnout in Teens

Key indicators that a teen might be experiencing burnout:
Emotional Signs
  • Chronic feelings of frustration, irritability, or sadness
  • A sense of hopelessness or overwhelm
  • Increased sensitivity to criticism
Behavioral Signs:
  • Withdrawal from friends, family, or activities they used to enjoy
  • Procrastination or avoidance of schoolwork and responsibilities
  • Risk-taking behaviors as a coping mechanism
Physical Signs:
  • Fatigue or exhaustion that doesn’t improve with rest
  • Frequent headaches or stomachaches
  • Changes in eating or sleeping patterns
Cognitive Signs:
  • Difficulty concentrating or staying focused
  • Declining academic performance
  • Negative self-talk or feelings of inadequacy

Why Burnout Happens

Teens today face a unique combination of challenges that contribute to burnout.

Academic pressure is a significant factor.

Many teens struggle to balance rigorous coursework, test preparation, and high expectations from parents, teachers, or themselves. This constant drive to perform can lead to chronic stress, especially when paired with a lack of adequate coping mechanisms. (Listen to this quick podcast episode on talking about stress and coping mechanisms.)

Another common contributor is overloaded schedules.

Many teens juggle multiple extracurricular activities, such as sports, music lessons, and part-time jobs, often leaving little time for rest and recovery. While these activities can be enriching, an over-commitment to them can push teens beyond their limits.

Social media adds another layer of stress.

Teens often feel pressure to maintain an idealized online persona, leading to constant comparisons and a fear of missing out (FOMO). This can exacerbate feelings of inadequacy and contribute to emotional exhaustion.

Finally, unrealistic expectations, whether self-imposed or from adults, can drive perfectionism.

The belief that they must excel in every area of life—academics, extracurriculars, and social interactions—can overwhelm teens and leave them feeling as though they are never good enough.

How to Help a Teen Experiencing Burnout

Recognizing the signs is only the first step.

Here’s how you can support a teen in recovering from burnout:

1. Foster Open Communication:
  • Create a safe space for teens to share their feelings without fear of judgment.
  • Ask open-ended questions like, “How have you been feeling about your workload lately?”
2. Encourage Balance:
  • Help them prioritize and set realistic goals.
  • Suggest taking breaks and engaging in relaxing activities.
3. Teach Coping Strategies:
  • Introduce mindfulness or relaxation techniques, such as deep breathing or meditation.
  • Encourage physical activity, which can improve mood and energy levels.
4. Model Healthy Habits:
  • Show them the importance of balancing work and leisure in your own life.
  • Demonstrate stress management techniques.
5. Seek Professional Help if Needed:

If burnout persists or worsens, consider consulting a school counselor or mental health professional.

Prevention is key.

So how you can help teens avoid burnout in the first place?

Promote Regular Downtime

Ensure they have unstructured time to relax and pursue hobbies.

Encourage Self-Care

Teach the importance of sleep, nutrition, and physical activity.

Celebrate Effort Over Perfection

Reinforce that mistakes are part of learning and growth.

Stay Connected

Regular check-ins can help you stay attuned to their emotional well-being.

Teens may not always recognize or express their struggles, so it’s up to the adults in their lives to watch for signs of burnout and offer support.

By fostering open communication, encouraging balance, and modeling healthy habits, you can help teens navigate stress and build resilience.

Remember, burnout is not a sign of weakness—it’s a signal that something needs to change.

Together, we can help teens thrive, even in challenging times.

Kelly Fann
Kelly Fann

Digital Media Manager

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How to Talk with Teens about Sextortion

How to Talk with Teens about Sextortion

Working with teenagers is incredibly rewarding, but let’s be real—sometimes it comes with some tough conversations. One of the most challenging topics we need to address today is sextortion and online scams.

These digital dangers are unfortunately becoming more common, and it’s crucial that we help our teens navigate them safely for their mental health and physical well-being.

Why It’s Important to Talk About Sextortion and Online Scams

Sextortion is when someone threatens to share explicit images or information about another person unless they comply with demands, usually for more images, money, or favors. Some of these schemes can have become quite complex too, including posing as brands to gain the teen and parents’ trust as they coax teens to share information or photos.

Nearly 1 in 3 preteens now aspire to be influencers according to this recent New York Times investigation. So offering a brand sponsorship is a very effective avenue for predators to achieve access to minors, even with permission from their parents.

Officer Gomez has seen this often in his experience as a School Resource Officer. He’s a great resource to follow. He talks more about this scheme in particular in an interview with The Ranch Podcast.

Online scams, on the other hand, can range from phishing attempts to more personal attacks that exploit trust.

Teens are particularly vulnerable because they spend so much time online and may not always recognize the warning signs of a scam or know what to do if they’re targeted- which isn’t surprising since most adults probably don’t either!

As educators, youth workers, and parents, it’s especially important that we do our best to understand the digital landscape so we can equip teens to stay safe. Even more critical, however, is our role as safe adults.

By having open, honest conversations, we can empower them to protect themselves and know where to turn if they need help.

How to Start the Conversation

  1. Create a Safe Space: Before diving into the topic, ensure your teens feel comfortable talking about sensitive issues. Let them know this is a judgment-free zone where their feelings and experiences are valid.
  2. Use Real-Life Examples: Teens respond well to stories, especially those that feel relatable. You can use stories from news reports or even hypothetical scenarios to illustrate what sextortion and online scams look like.
  3. Ask Open-Ended Questions: Instead of lecturing, engage them in a conversation. Questions like, “What would you do if someone you didn’t know asked for a private photo?” or “Have you ever seen a suspicious message online?” can spark important discussions.
  4. Share Resources: Encourage teens to explore resources like the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children (NCMEC) or CyberTipline. These platforms offer tons of information and reporting tools that are teen-friendly.

What to Emphasize During the Conversation

  • Trust Your Gut
    If something feels off, it probably is. Teens should trust their instincts and not engage with anyone or anything that makes them uncomfortable.
  • The Importance of Privacy
    Remind them that once something is online, it’s almost impossible to take back. Emphasize the importance of keeping personal information, including photos and videos, private.
  • Reporting Is Key
    Encourage teens to report anything suspicious to a trusted adult immediately. Whether it’s a strange message, an inappropriate request, or a scam, reporting it can prevent further harm.
  • They’re Not Alone
    One of the most important things to communicate is that if something happens, they are not alone. Many others have faced similar situations, and there are always people willing to help.
  • They Are Not Going to Be in Trouble. 
    Many teens and kids are afraid to report what’s happening to them because they are afraid they’ll be in trouble.  It’s important to let them know that authorities and trusted adults are on their side.

Follow-Up: Keeping the Conversation Going

After the initial conversation, keep the dialogue open. Check in with your teens regularly to see if they’ve encountered anything unusual online. Make it clear that they can always come to you with concerns, no matter how small they may seem.

You can also bring in guest speakers, such as representatives from local law enforcement or cyber safety experts, to reinforce these messages. The Dallas/Fort Worth Internet Crimes Against Children Task Force is a great local resource that could provide valuable insights.

Kelly Fann
Kelly Fann

Digital Media Manager

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Winter Holidays in the Classroom

Winter Holidays in the Classroom

December brings with it a myriad of celebrations and advent activities, and not just for Christmas. The winter holiday season holds delights for many cultures and religious communities!

While Christmas remains the most commonly celebrated holiday in America, the percentage of people who celebrate it has declined significantly according to polls and census data. A 2023 Statista poll reports that 78% of the people interviewed celebrate Christmas, whether they were religious or not.

A teacher recently posted a comment on Twitter that gave pause for reflection. It was a comment on a repost from 4 years ago. You can read more of the post below, but the gist is that one teacher had posted that “unless you work in a Christian school, Christmas doesn’t belong in your classroom.” So the teacher polled her class and what she learned caused her to change the way she approached winter holidays in her classroom.

We don’t know what everyone else is carrying in their invisible second backpacks. Some students have suffered trauma during past holidays. Some students celebrate different holidays. Some students don’t celebrate because they don’t have adults present at home to celebrate with. Any easy way to make teens feel seen is simply to ask and to listen when they speak, like Mrs. Bond did. It’s also incredibly useful to know more about the winter holidays that the families around you might be celebrating.

Here are some common winter holidays you should know:

Advent: Sun, Dec 3, 2023 – Sun, Dec 24, 2023

The word Advent derives from the Latin adventus, which means an arrival or visit. Advent celebrates the coming of Christ and is traditionally observed the four Sundays before Christmas Day.

Advent traditions usually include lighting a candle each Sunday to celebrate a different aspect of the Christmas story; advent calendars with toys and chocolate; daily advent reading plans.

 

Hanukkah: Dec. 7, 2023 – Dec. 15, 2023

People outside the Jewish community often think it’s just the Jewish version of Christmas, but it has been celebrated since before Jesus’ birth. However, it commemorates the victory of the Macabees over the Syrian Greeks in 164 BC. The Hannukah story tells of when the temple was restored and there was not enough oil to keep the temple lit day and night, but the small amount of oil they had burned bright for eight days.

Common Hannukah traditions are lighting one candle of the menorah each day for nine days; playing dreidel; fried foods to symbolize the oil; and in America, small gifts for each night.

 

Kwanzaa: Dec. 26 – Jan. 1

Born in a time of racial unrest, Kwanzaa is a weeklong celebration of African-American culture and heritage. The name, “Kwanzaa”, is derived from the word “first” in Swahili and takes inspiration from the start of the harvest season in Africa when the first crops are gathered.

Kwanzaa is celebrated with black, red, and green candles; a banquet on December 31 with food and dancing; gifts for small children.

 

Winter Solstice: Dec 21

At the Winter Solstice, the sun travels the shortest path through the sky, resulting in the day of the year with the least sunlight, and therefore, the longest night.

A common winter solstice tradition is burning a yule log to celebrate the days getting “longer”.

Celebrating Winter Holidays and Creating Holiday Traditions that Unify

In the classroom, it’s important for every student to feel appreciated for their unique culture and background. There might not be room for a specific holiday or it might be an opportunity to explore different winter holidays.

The important thing is to take into account your school environment and the kids within it.

At home, shared traditions can bring opportunities to connect with teens and an excuse for much-needed fun.

Be sure to follow for fun ideas, a gift guide for teens, games to play as a family, travel tips, and other ways to make holidays with teens meaningful for kids and adults.

What are your family traditions? If you are a teacher, what are some ways that you make winter fun?

About the Author

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De-stressing Traditions (And Why They Matter)

De-stressing Traditions (And Why They Matter)

A few years ago I found some gingerbread houses on sale at Target and we put them together. My oldest son kept eating the weird candy dots in the box instead of decorating and the cookie itself was not at all delicious at all. Who wants to eat cookies everyone has touched anyway?

We didn’t ever finish, and eventually, I threw the whole thing away. The eco-minimalist in me cringed that we were destroying the environment and wasting food.

My son loved it.

The next year it was ALDI I think.

Same story.

Grubby fingers, gross candy. Short-lived and not delicious.

Then in 2020, I didn’t go into stores, and so I didn’t have a kit. I started scrummaging for how to make the gingerbread houses. As I stared into my pantry under the spell of Great British Bakeoff, gingerbread recipe pulled up on my phone, trying to decide if it was worth it… I spotted my kids’ favorite snack.

Graham crackers.

And it dawned on me that I’d been making the whole thing far more complicated than it really had to be.

Of course, I did what any modern adult would do.
I googled it.

Friends, I found this video, and the deal was done. We even used leftover Halloween candy and pretzels we had in the house to decorate. (Check this construction tip out if you plan on having graham cracker architecture competitions)

Then everyone ate their house for breakfast the next day and a new tradition was born, like a phoenix out of the ash of 2020.

We did the whole thing again on repeat for the rest of the season.

It’s a silly story, but creating traditions can sometimes start out that way, can’t it? A little messy, a little thrown together, but a whole lotta fun.

In fact, the importance of a tradition lies in the shared meaning and value we give it.

We’ve got a great podcast lineup this fall, full of traditions that are fun for teens, too.

But why do traditions matter?

Why are we drawn to the idea of traditions? What do we gain from them and how can we maximize the benefits for our kids?

I felt like something about the chaos and the unknown of the pandemic itself made creating and keeping traditions more important than ever.

And it made perfect sense. Just like routines create a sense of calm and secureness, traditions create continuity and identity in a family, or in a group of friends for that matter.

But traditions are more than routine because they carry with them a deeper meaning. They strengthen bonds and pass on a sense of belonging.

When you look back on your childhood, traditions are, at their very best, the collection of moments that made your house a home. They are the moments that describe what’s important to your family, your school, your team, your group of friends.

Sometimes, they even become a right of passage into adulthood as you become responsible for carrying on the tradition- whether it’s lighting the shamash, carving the turkey or putting the star on top of the tree.

So what makes a good tradition?

  • It’s easy to repeat year after year.
    Think time and money.
  • Everyone looks forward to it.
    Because life’s too short!
  • It relates to your family values.
    Kids with a strong sense of identity are more confident and less likely to participate in risky behavior. This is a great opportunity to build on your family identity.

I saw a survey recently that said that 67% of parents say they feel the need to produce the perfect holiday. Talker Research published an article in November 2021 saying that 4 out of 5 parents feel pressured to get their kids the perfect gift. That’s a lot of holiday stress!

No matter what holiday you celebrate, I think we can all agree that it should be special, meaningful, and fun for everyone- parents included. Believe me when I tell you I am preaching to myself here. The best-laid plans are worthless if all you are is stressed.

So take a deep breath and let go of all the things you feel like you have to do to make the holidays perfect. Then cling to the things that bring you and your family joy.

It could even be a fun dinner conversation to ask what everyone remembers most fondly about past holidays and go from there! It doesn’t have to be fancy. Or perfect. It just has to be yours.

And if you’re worried about everything being perfect, the University of Nevada did a little research on gift wrapping in 2019. Researchers found that poorly wrapped gifts were better received than well-wrapped gifts!

Sometimes when things aren’t perfect, we actually appreciate them more for what they are, instead of measuring them against our false expectations of what we think they should be.

Think of your traditions as a gift from one generation to the next. They don’t have to be fancy. They don’t have to be many. In fact, it might even be better if they aren’t.

 

P.S. If you’re looking for easy, fun tradition ideas, check out episode 36 of the Teen Life Podcast or this list from AHAParenting.com or this one from VeryWellFamily.com.

Kelly Fann

Kelly Fann

Digital Media Manager

Kelly has a desire to empower young people to grow into the best version of themselves. Using her background in branding and word-smithing, she is a master at highlighting resources that help teens learn skills that will enable them to grow and to adapt, to enjoy life and to be better citizens. Kelly has a MA in Linguistics from North Texas University.