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In this episode of the Stay Calm, Don’t Panic! Podcast, Chris Robey is joined by Dr. David Fraze to discuss the affect of disappointment on teenagers. Is disappointment all bad? Is rescuing our children the best answer? Jump into this great conversation and hear ways to help push and equip students to face challenges and disappointments.
In this episode, Dr. David Fraze answers…
- Why do adults, especially parents, treat disappointment like a bad thing?
- What are a few of the benefits of facing and journeying through disappointment?
- What are a few ways adults can help students face and journey through disappointment?
- Am I trying to prevent teenagers from facing disappointment?
- Are my expectations and views of my teenager realistic?
- Am I seeking my identity in the successes of my children?
- What disappointments have you faced in life?
- When things are tough, what helps you get through it?
- How can you learn from past disappointments and use them to make you better?
In this episode, we mentioned the following resources:
Dr. David Fraze (D.Min., Fuller Theological seminary) is Special Assistant to the President of Lubbock Christian University and Fort Worth Area Director and Manager of DFW Character Coaches for Fellowship of Christian Athletes. He is a popular speaker and writer on all things youth ministry and adolescence. Based out of North Richland Hills, Texas, David has been working with students for over 25 years. Follow him on Twitter!
Chris Robey is the Program Director for Teen Life. Earlier in his career while working as a youth minister, Chris earned a Masters Degree in Family Life Education from Lubbock Christian University to better equip his work with teenagers and families. Chris’ career and educational opportunities have exposed him to teenagers from a variety of backgrounds. Follow him on Twitter
Karlie Duke started working as Teen Life’s Communications Director after graduating from Abilene Christian University with a degree in Communications with a minor in Family Studies. Karlie has worked with teenagers for the past 5 years and is passionate about encouraging students to live better stories. Follow her on Twitter
If you have a question about something you heard or just want to give us some feedback, please leave us a comment below. We would love to hear from you!
We are only 7 weeks away from our 7th annual TL5K!
As we continue to share stories from our Teen Lifeline Support Groups, we hope that you are seeing the benefits that these groups bring to the students, school districts, campus counselors and the facilitators that lead these groups.
We are so passionate about our #TL5K is because the funds raised by this one event help make these groups possible! We have the opportunity to continue to grow and reach teenagers with 100 volunteer facilitators trained to use our Life Lived Better Curriculum to lead support groups in their local school or church.
One of my favorite things about working for Teen Lifeline is sharing group stories with these other facilitators, and this has been especially fun since my mother-in-law, Julee Duke, started leading groups this semester! I may be a little biased, but she is providing support and encouragement to students who need a listening ear and a chance to be heard and accepted. Her job, and the goal of all of our facilitators, is to equip, encourage and empower the students in their groups to live life better – to choose to live a better and different story.
My name is Julee Duke, and I am leading my first Teen Lifeline group at a Middle School in Fort Worth ISD. I have nine 8th grade girls in my group, and although we are only halfway through the 8-week Support Group Curriculum, I have learned so much about these girls and their need for hope in their lives.
The first week proved to be challenging with one girl not making eye contact with me or speaking a word, but slowly scooting her chair closer and closer until she was right beside me by the end of our time together. Since that first day, she is the first one in the room and the last one out, in hopes of having a one-on-one moment with me outside of the group. She is now looking at me, smiling and sharing difficult memories and joyous victories – HOPE!
With this particular girl and the rest of the group, as the weeks have passed, hearts have softened. The girls are now fully engaged and look forward to our time together. It isn’t me or the snacks that I provide at the end that makes them want to come back – it’s that their deep desire to be heard and acknowledged is being met, some for the first time in their young lives.
There have been tears shed, confessions made, and difficult stories shared. I am extremely thankful for this opportunity and am blessed to be a small part of encouraging young people that there is hope for a better life.
In case you missed our last blog on hope, check out Chris Robey’s ideas on Helping Students Find Hope in Hopelessness.
As we started training we realized that we didn’t really have any hills in our route. Which we were fine with but at the same time knew would hurt us if we ran a race where there were hills. So we decided to find some hills to help us with our training. We did and they were killer. I had such a hard time with those hills every time we ran them. Then we started training for another race coming up in November and we ran the hills again. I noticed I didn’t dread the hills as much as I had before. I commented about this to my running partner and he agreed. The more I thought about this I tried to think about how this could apply to helping us live life better.
My take is this. As I ran those hills more and more and ran some hills, bigger and smaller, my body got used to running them and my head realized that I could do it. The deal was it took time and doing something I didn’t want to do over and over again to reap the benefit that I finally got, just this past August. In life I think there are challenges that we face often. Maybe it is a person or a boss or a car that keeps breaking down. There are several things we can realize in this. One that we will get some benefit out of the situation. Whether it is learning to deal with people, submitting to authority, or being able to appreciate a new car even more after dealing with one that has problems all the time. For me it has been facing those challenges head on time after time when I don’t want to and finally reaping the benefit and knowing that I made it through a season or a rough time in my life. This increases my confidence and helps me know even more that I can face the next challenge without breaking.
Share your story of overcoming challenges in the comments. I’m always encouraged by reading about other peoples stories too. I hope you’re encouraged by mine.