Dr. Mark DeYoung Talks Anxiety

Dr. Mark DeYoung Talks Anxiety

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How to help a teenager with anxiety

What is anxiety? And how can we help a teenager with anxiety? These questions are more are answered in an interview Dr. Mark DeYoung.

We are shedding light on a topic that can be easily misunderstood. Don’t overlook teen anxiety or panic. There are steps that you can take today!

In this episode, you’ll find out…

  • What is anxiety?
  • How anxiety is different from depression.
  • How anxiety specifically affects teenagers.
  • Some symptoms of anxiety to keep an eye on.
  • Coping skills that teens lack and how to help them succeed.

Ask yourself…

  • Am I really listening or just offering advice?
  • How can I help take some pressure off of teenagers?
  • Am I modeling positive boundaries and stress coping skills in my own life?
Teens need our ears more than they need our advice.
Dr. Mark DeYoung

Go ask a teen…

  • I’ve noticed that you’ve been acting different. What’s going on?
  • What boundaries can you put in place to take some stress off?
  • When you feel anxious, what is a positive thing that seems to help?

Resources:

In this episode, we mentioned the following resources:

Have a question?

If you have a question about something you heard or just want to give us some feedback, please leave us a comment below.  We would love to hear from you!
Dr. Mark DeYoung

Dr. Mark DeYoung

Special Guest

Chris Robey
Chris Robey

Former CEO

Karlie Duke
Karlie Duke

Communications Director

More Resources You Might Like

Episode 103 Anxiety & Gap Years
Episode 19: Back to School Anxiety and Simone Biles
Title Image: Depression & Lemon8

5 Ways to Keep Teens Safe This Summer

5 Ways to Keep Teens Safe This Summer

Helping Keep Teens Safe This Summer: Boundaries That Build Trust

As a teenager, there are few things greater than Summer Break – no school, sleeping in, more time with friends, days by the pool or at the lake, family vacations, snow cones, and a little more freedom.

But here’s the thing: with all that freedom often comes…fewer boundaries.

While summer brings a break from school schedules, it can also lead to relaxed expectations and fewer boundaries. We get it—teens crave independence, and honestly, they deserve the chance to spread their wings. And as someone who works with students during the school year, let me gently remind you: to keep teens safe, they still need your guidance, even in the midst of all the fun.

In fact, summer might just be the most important time for trusted adults to lean in even more. Not to restrict them, but to help guide them—because deep down, teens want to know someone’s in their corner, paying attention, and helping them make wise decisions.

5 Ways to Help Keep Teens Safe, Empowered, and Connected This Summer

Know Where They Are—But Make It About Trust, Not Control

I’m not saying you have to constantly be tracking their location, but you can build a habit of simple check-ins. Set a family standard where your teen calls or texts before changing plans. It’s a quick way to keep everyone on the same page, and it encourages teens to think through their actions and communicate their choices.

Headed to a friend’s house? Great! Grabbing a Sonic drink? Love it! On the way home? Awesome—see you soon.

The goal here isn’t surveillance—it’s connection. When your teen shares where they’re going and what they’re doing, it opens up opportunities for real conversations:

“Who were you with?” “What made you laugh the most?” “What was the highlight of your day?”

These moments build trust and show that you care, not just about their safety, but about them.

Agree on a Curfew and Stick to it.

Curfews get a bad rap, but hear us out: they actually help teens feel secure, even when they pretend they hate them. So don’t toss the curfew out altogether just because school’s out! Whether it’s 10 PM or midnight, your curfew is a clear message: “I’m thinking ahead for you, and I want you to come home safe.”

Most importantly, talk about curfew before it becomes an issue. If your teen walks in at 2 AM and you’ve never had the curfew conversation, that’s on you—not them. Clear expectations create fewer surprises (and fewer arguments!).

And when plans change last-minute? Trust your gut. Not every home has the same standards, and it’s okay to say “no” to a sleepover that wasn’t pre-planned. Saying, “Come on home,” is one way you show your teen that their well-being comes first. Teens are smart—they’ll remember which adults stayed steady and showed up with care.

Have a Built-In Accountability Plan

This doesn’t have to be a formal contract. But having a simple routine that keeps everyone honest? That’s gold.

One family we know had a rule: every teen had to wake their parent up with a hug or a kiss when they got home—no exceptions. At the time, the teen thought it was just sweet (or maybe annoying). Later? They realized it was accountability in disguise.

You don’t have to copy that exact rule, but find one that works for your family. Whether it’s a quick chat when they walk in, a lights-on check-in, or just a “text me when you’re home”. The point isn’t to catch them doing something wrong—it’s to keep the door open for connection and honesty. Accountability is a signal: you matter, and I’m here.

Keep the Conversation Going

Boundaries are great. But connection? That’s the real superpower.

If you want to keep your teen safe, the best thing you can do is know them. Like, really know them. Know their friends. What they’re watching. What’s stressing them out. What’s lighting them up.

If that kind of relationship feels far off right now, that’s okay. It’s never too late to lean in. Start small. Ask good questions. Stay curious. Be present.

Need a place to start? Check out our podcast episode on building trust and connection with Brenda McAdoo. You’ve got this!

Be the “Cool House” (With a Side of Structure)

Worried about what might happen at someone else’s house? Make your house the place to be.

You don’t have to install a slushie machine or buy out the snack aisle (though no one’s stopping you). Just be the house that welcomes teens in and sets the tone. Host movie nights. Set up a fire pit. Get out the crazy, loud board games. Perfect an easy dessert (Brookies are always a hit – check out the recipe below).

Create a space where teens can be themselves—and where they know they’re safe, seen, and loved. Don’t shy away from setting rules or expectations. They’ll respect you more for it, even if they pretend otherwise.

Don’t just manage chaos this summer…stay engaged and connected!

You’re helping shape a teen’s sense of identity, worth, and belonging. Boundaries don’t push teens away—they pull them closer when done right. 

They’re listening—even when it seems like they’re not.

And hey, if you’ve got other summer survival tips or stories, we’d love to hear them! Drop a comment or reach out—we’re in this together.

Have the best (and safest) summer ever!

Karlie’s Brookie Recipe

🍪 Prep Time: 10 mins
⏲ Bake Time: 40 mins
🍫 Servings: 24 bars

Ingredients:

  • 1 (16 oz) package refrigerated chocolate chip cookie dough
    (or your favorite homemade recipe — if you’re an overachiever!)

  • 24 Oreo cookies

  • 1 box brownie mix (plus eggs/oil/water as called for on the box)

Directions:

  • Preheat your oven to 350°F

  • Prep a 9×13 pan by lining it with parchment paper or lightly greasing it (or use a foil pan for less cleanup!)
  • Press the cookie dough evenly into the bottom of the pan. This is your delicious base layer!

  • Top with a single layer of Oreo cookies — about 24 should do the trick.

  • Mix the brownie batter according to the box instructions.

  • Pour the brownie batter evenly over the Oreos. Gently spread to cover.

  • Bake at 350°F for 40 minutes, or until a toothpick in the center comes out mostly clean.

  • Cool before slicing (if you can wait). Then cut, serve, and prepare to be asked to make them again and again!

Karlie Duke
Karlie Duke

Communications Director

More Resources You Might Like

ChatGPT 4 + Summer Bucket List
Teen Life Podcast episode 109

Helping When It Hurts

Helping When It Hurts

I just got back from serving with LiveBeyond in Thomazeau, Haiti, where poverty, starvation, sickness and Satan can be seen at every corner. While I was still processing this level of hurt and pain, I came home to the injustice of the Orlando shooting.

Hurt has so many different faces.

Hurt looks like scrubbing a tiny Haitian head that is covered in ringworm. Hurt looks like hundreds of people mourning the loss of loved ones to gunshots. Hurt looks like students feeling unsafe at their schools because of bullies. Hurt looks like shoeless feet traveling miles to receive medical care. Hurt looks like a nation crying out after acts of hate and prejudice. Hurt looks like a teenager struggling after his parents go through a painful divorce.

Hurt can be overwhelming and sometimes it is easier to do nothing rather than wade into the unknown of pain. However, if there is anything that I have learned while in Haiti, it is that we cannot simply sit back and stay quiet. If not us, then who?

But where do we start? How can I help people that are miles, states or even nations away?

There isn’t an easy or fix-it-all answer, but hopefully these can provide a good starting place for how to help in the midst of hurt:

Focus on the person in front of you.

Are you far away from Orlando or Haiti? Unless you have time off and money for a plane ticket, that is probably not going to change, but you can love on that neighbor who is also struggling. Or you can tell a friend who feels targeted how sorry you are. You can take food to someone who has recently experienced loss, or volunteer with a local organization.

When there is a tragedy or when the hurt and pain is too overwhelming, start by loving the person directly in front of you. Don’t freeze. Don’t turn around and run. By focusing on one person at a time, you are making a difference in a manageable way! Once you have made that person in front of you feel loved and heard, move on to another person and do the same for them!

Find ways to encourage from afar.

Technology has made it incredibly easy to connect with people in other states, countries or continents! If you can’t stand in front of someone who is hurting, find ways to encourage them from where you are. Here are a few ideas of how to help from your own home:

  • Spend time in prayer for those that are hurting. For example, print off the names of those who died in Orlando – spend time specifically praying for their families by name.
  • Send letters, Facebook messages or care packages. Find those who are affected or maybe those who are living in areas where they are interacting with hurting people and encourage them with words and thoughtful gestures!
  • Support organizations who are helping those in need. Even if you only have $10 a month, you can partner with an organization and make a difference in the lives of those who are hurting.

Take up the cause of the oppressed.

“He defended the cause of the poor and needy, and so all went well. Is that not what it means to know me?” declares the Lord.

Jeremiah 22:16

Since I am a Christian, the message of this verse is very clear – if I want to know God, it is my job to defend the poor and needy.

If you are not motivated by Christianity or a sense of higher calling, you can still stand in the gap for those who have no one else to defend them or speak on their behalf.

This does not mean that you need to go on a 2,000 word Facebook rant to shame those who act out in hate, but instead think about how you can offer your thoughts, prayers and encouragement in a short, positive post. Maybe defending their cause means bringing hope and understanding into a conversation of condemnation.

For me, it means talking about the organizations and people I love (like Teen Lifeline & LiveBeyond) whenever possible. I can share the struggles and challenges of teenagers and the people of Haiti. I can bring awareness and recruit others to join their cause.

So, I am asking you to join me. Let’s not sit by and retreat in times of pain! Instead, let’s try to help in the midst of hurt. Do you have any other ideas of how to help in times of pain and hurt? We would love to hear them!

Karlie Duke was in one of Teen Lifeline’s original support groups and now is our Communications Director. She is passionate about encouraging students to live better stories.
Don’t Panic about Grief with Beverly Ross

Don’t Panic about Grief with Beverly Ross

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Grief comes in many different forms, but it is something everyone deals with at some point in life. In this episode, Chris and Karlie are joined by Beverly Ross to talk about the basics of grief, what to expect from a grieving teenager, and how we can better support teens who are grieving.

Don’t panic about grief, there is a way to bring hope and encouragement to difficult circumstances!

It takes courage & bravery to stand with someone in pain – step into what’s uncomfortable.
Beverly Ross

In this episode, you’ll find out…

  • Some of the unique ways teenagers deal with grief.
  • Advice about what can be said or done to better walk alongside a teen experiencing grief.
  • Signs that a teen might need to seek help from a professional.
  • Examples of grief-producers, especially for teenagers.
  • How to use the acronym PERS (Physical, Emotional, Relational, Spiritual) to positively cope with grief.
  • Ways we as a community can surround and encourage those who are grieving.

Ask yourself…

  • Am I putting too much pressure on myself to do or say the perfect thing?
  • Could this teenager be talking to someone else if they aren’t talking to me?
  • Am I aware of important dates that I need to remember and recognize?

Go ask a teen…

  • What do you need?
  • What is it like for you right now? Tell me your story.
  • What would you like to do for holidays? How would you like to hold space?

Resources on grief you might like

Have a question?

If you have a question about something you heard or just want to give us some feedback, please leave us a comment below.  We would love to hear from you!
Karlie Duke
Karlie Duke

Communications Director

Chris Robey
Chris Robey

Former CEO

Beverly Ross

Beverly Ross

Special Guest

The Importance of Breathing

The Importance of Breathing

Breathing.

It’s so easy, so second nature that we rarely even think about doing it. Did you know that the average human being (hopefully that’s you) takes around 12-20 breaths per minute? That means that you take anywhere from 17,280 to 28,800 breaths every single day. Do you know how many of those breaths I think about on a given day? Maybe a handful.

I think about breathing…

  • When my allergies are terrible, and I can’t breathe through my nose.
  • Before I am jump in pool and need to hold my breath.
  • After my dog chews up a favorite pair of shoes, and I take 10 slow breaths before I try to give him away.
  • While I have the hiccups and hold my breath to make them stop.
  • When I am running (or let’s be real, walking) and can’t seem to catch my breath.

Breathing is one of the most important human functions and it’s the one that we probably think about the least. It is incredible that we are designed in a way that we don’t have to mentally think, “Breathe in, breathe out,” every time we need to take a breath.

However, I would argue that we need to think about taking a deep breath more often!

This week, the Teen Lifeline staff took two days to get away, take a deep breath and use it to refocus as we head into a busy few months. It is easy to run on auto-pilot and forget that taking deep, intentional breaths (both physically and emotionally) are necessary.

IMG_1122

For Teen Lifeline, this time away to catch our breath was invaluable. I could probably come up with 100 reasons why should should slow down every once in awhile and take a breather, but here are the top 3 reasons:

Taking a deep breath helps refocus.

Stop and take a moment to breathe in deeply. If you’re like me, this gives you an opportunity to stop thinking (even if just for a second) and gain clarity on what to do next. Take a few hours every few months to take a mental break from your every day routine. Think about what you have done in the last couple of months and what you can do to prepare for the future ones.

We all need to be refocused every now and then! Don’t continue to live, work, or play without thinking – take a mental deep breath to refocus in order to reach the goals and dreams you have planned.

 

Taking a deep breath brings perspective.

You know that feeling when you are in the middle of something big, scary and unknown? That feeling that the world is going to end and nothing is going right? Whether you are in the midst of a big decision, career change, or family crisis, taking a deep breath could be the first step to overcoming that difficult situation. Take a break from worrying, gain perspective by talking to someone you love and trust, or just take an afternoon to remember how faithful the Lord has been in the past.

In one of our Stay Calm, Don’t Panic! Podcast episodes, Dr. Michael Arnold said, “It’s when I’ve been the most still that i’ve been able to see all the amazing things God does heroically, miraculously in my life.” I love this quote! It perfectly sums up the effect that taking a deep breath and moment to be still can have on your perspective.

 

Taking a deep breath motivates you to keep going. 

When you feel like you can’t go on, when you’re exhausted and at the end of your rope, try stopping for a breath. Our Teen Lifeline retreat was the perfect opportunity to take a deep breath and gain the energy and motivation to continue helping teenagers. Sometimes more than a single breath is needed to keep going – maybe you need an hour or a whole day to relax and do some mental and emotional breathing.

When your kids are messier and crazier than ever, take a day to get a pedicure or massage. When your job is too demanding, go on a bike ride or take a quick nap in your car. When you are in a busy season of life and have no time to spare, choose to take lunch with someone who will encourage and uplift you (everyone has to eat, right?)

By taking the time for a short break and a deep breath, you will actually come back to your kids, job, or busy schedule more motivated and ready to work. It will make you a better parent, employee and an all-around happier person if you schedule some breathing time into your life.

 

Do you need to take a breather? Have you discovered any great ways to refocus, gain perfective or find motivation? If so, let us know! We’d love to learn more ways to take a deep breath!

Karlie Duke was in one of Teen Lifeline’s original support groups and now is our Communications Director. She is passionate about encouraging students to live better stories.