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Teen Responsiveness + Cell Phone Boundaries | Ep. 143

Teen Responsiveness + Cell Phone Boundaries | Ep. 143

by | Jan 23, 2024 | Parenting, Podcast, School, Technology

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An Adult Guide to Navigating Cell Phone Boundaries for Teens

In the digital age, cell phones have become an integral part of our daily lives, especially for teenagers. They serve as a means of communication, entertainment, and learning. However, as teachers and parents, guiding teens to establish healthy boundaries with their cell phones is crucial for their overall well-being and development.

Of course, there are lots of opinions on how to approach this topic, but we’ve put together some suggestions to get you started.

Here are some essential tips to navigate cell phone boundaries for teens:

Establish clear expectations.

Communication is key. Set clear guidelines on when and how cell phones should be used. Discuss the importance of responsible usage, including limitations on screen time during meals, study hours, and bedtime. Collaborate with teens to create a balanced plan that respects their independence while ensuring accountability.

Check out Josh Shipp’s free download to create a cell phone contract with your teen.

Educate teens on digital wellness.

Teach teens about the concept of digital wellness. Encourage them to take breaks, engage in physical activities, and maintain a healthy balance between online and offline activities. Discuss the impact of excessive screen time on mental health and the importance of managing their online presence responsibly.

You might even consider a digital safety course like this one for schools or this one for families.

Lead by example.

Parents and teachers serve as role models. Demonstrate healthy cell phone habits by practicing what you preach. Show teens the importance of being present during conversations, meals, and family time without being glued to screens. Model self-discipline in your own technology use.

Be a safe place to talk.

Create a safe environment where teens feel comfortable discussing their online experiences, concerns, and challenges. Encourage open dialogue without judgment. Offer guidance on handling cyberbullying, privacy settings, and navigating the digital world responsibly.

Implement tech free zones.

Designate specific areas or times as technology-free zones, such as bedrooms or family gatherings. Encourage face-to-face interactions and quality time without the distraction of cell phones. Emphasize the importance of real connections over virtual ones.

Utilize Parental Controls and Monitoring Tools

Explore parental control features provided by cell phone carriers or third-party applications. These tools can help regulate screen time, block inappropriate content, and track usage patterns. However, balance monitoring with trust and open communication to build a healthy relationship based on mutual respect.

Encourage positive usage.

Guide teens to explore constructive ways to use their cell phones. Encourage them to access educational apps, creative content, or volunteering opportunities online. Help them recognize the potential of technology for personal growth and skill development.

Stay informed and updated on the latest trends, apps, and pitfalls.

Technology evolves rapidly. Stay informed about the latest trends, apps, and social media platforms popular among teens. Understanding their digital landscape enables better guidance and support.

Subscribe to our weekly updates for tips, tricks, trends, and ways to connect with your teen.

Collaborate with school initiatives.

Teachers can integrate lessons on digital citizenship and responsible technology use into the curriculum. Engage students in discussions, workshops, or activities focused on online safety, critical thinking, and ethical behavior in the digital world.

Don’t panic.

Establishing healthy cell phone boundaries for teens requires a collaborative effort between teachers, parents, and teens themselves. By fostering open communication, setting clear expectations, and being positive role models, we can empower teens to navigate the digital world responsibly while prioritizing their well-being.

Remember, it’s not about eliminating technology but about teaching teens to use it mindfully and purposefully, creating a balanced approach that enriches their lives without overshadowing other essential aspects of their growth and development.

Also in this episode:

  • Teen terms that might not mean what you think.
  • Why your teen isn’t responding to your text messages.

In this episode, we mentioned or used the following resources.

Have a question?

If you have a question about something you heard or just want to give us some feedback, please leave us a comment below.  We would love to hear from you!

Karlie Duke
Karlie Duke

Communications Director

Tobin Hodges
Tobin Hodges

Program Director

Caleb Hatchett
Caleb Hatchett

Podcast Host

More Resources You Might Like

Ep 92 - Social Media Report & Parasocial Relationships
The CDC recommends that schools take action to educate teens on improving their mental health. Support Groups are a great solution!
Episode 123: School Partnerships & Fantasy Football

5 Positive Ways to Deal with Parents

5 Positive Ways to Deal with Parents

by | Jan 19, 2024 | Blog, Parenting

We see a lot of teens in Support Groups and if there’s a recurring theme, it’s that dealing with parents can be tough!

The crazy thing is the same issues that frustrate teens often frustrate adults. Life is completely different for teens than it was for adults at the same age, but there are a lot of aspects of communication that haven’t changed.

If you are a parent, it can be hard to see your teen’s side of things or how they are trying to communicate.

Parents and teachers complain most often about behavior, but a lot of times, the adults aren’t listening or allowing teens to explain.

If you are a teen here are some tips if you’re having trouble communicating with your parent(s).

Wait for the right time.

This may be difficult depending on how much your parent works or other factors. But it will come. Sometimes you can help make it the right time. Get them their favorite treat, drink, or sit and watch their favorite show with them. The effort you put in will be worth it when the result is a positive conversation.

Do things before you are asked.

This one isn’t immediately appealing because you are still doing what they want. BUT if you get annoyed because they bug you to mow the lawn or clean your room, it is worth it. If you do it before they ask, it saves you the hassle of an annoying argument or fight. You both win.

Don’t push their buttons.

Facts. If you know how to annoy the adults in your life in under five minutes, it just shows how close you are. However, it doesn’t mean you are in control. You might feel like you’re in control, but it’s guaranteed to cause you more losses than wins. Instead, take that knowledge and use it to get what you really want. Better communication.

Don’t let them push yours.

Fun fact. The adults in your life know how to push your buttons too. You get to decide if you will allow it or not. You can choose not to be annoyed- or at least not to act on it. While it’s true that adults should, well, be adults, we all know that sometimes that just doesn’t happen. But if you don’t let it stress you out, you’re guaranteed to feel better.

Think ahead.

Recognize potential hazards and plan ahead what you can say or do when they come along. Or even better, avoid them if you can. This is hard. You might need a trusted adult like a school counselor or another trusted adult to help you talk this one out.

Also note: this doesn’t not apply to situations where an adult is harming you or failing to keep you safe. If you are not safe at home, or with any adult, you need to tell someone you trust and get help. It’s not on you to avoid abuse.

You can’t keep every argument from happening and not all parents are always reasonable. But most parents want a good relationship with their kids. They want to understand and communicate better.

Maybe this will help.

 

What are other ways you can deal with parents in a positive way?

Teen Say

How can I get the adults in my life to care and not lecture?

  • Be intentional about when you talk to them- especially when you bring up tough topics. A lot of time, their emotional state or reaction isn’t about you! It’s about other things that you might not be aware of.
  • If needed, ask someone to mediate a conversation between you and the adult that you feel frustrated with.

Adults Say

How can I connect with teens and get them to open up to me?

  • Be available
  • Be yourself
  • Connect during the good times so you have that background during hard conversations. Look for ways to just have fun with no agenda!

Talkative Teens + Ahead App + Blind Boxes | Ep. 142

Talkative Teens + Ahead App + Blind Boxes | Ep. 142

by | Jan 16, 2024 | Podcast, Technology

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Navigating Talkative Teens in Group Settings

Dealing with talkative teens in a group or class setting can be challenging, but understanding the reasons behind their behavior and implementing effective strategies can create a positive and inclusive environment for everyone involved. In episode 142 of the podcast, we explore the reasons why teens tend to overshare or talk too much and provide practical tips for teachers, group facilitators, and youth workers to redirect and engage these talkative teens.

Why do teens overshare or talk too much?

Understanding the underlying reasons behind talkative behavior is crucial for effective management.

  • ADHD
    Some teens may exhibit talkative behavior due to conditions like ADHD, where impulsivity and hyperactivity play a role.
  • Insecurity
    Talking excessively can be a way for teens to mask insecurities and divert attention from their vulnerabilities.
  • Desire for Attention
    Some teens enjoy being the center of attention, seeking validation and approval from their peers.
  • Peer Encouragement
    Encouragement from peers who prefer not to participate in discussions can also contribute to talkative behavior.
  • Lack of Recognition
    Teens may talk excessively if they feel unheard in other areas of their lives, seeking acknowledgment and understanding.
  • Social Unawareness
    In some cases, teens may simply be unaware of social cues and the impact of their talkative behavior on the group.

Where can it be bad?

Excessive talking in group settings can have negative consequences, such as disruption and annoyance to others. When one person monopolizes the conversation, other voices are missing and students lose a chance to learn from each other. It’s also a lost opportunity for the talkative one to practice essential social skills and self-awareness.

Addressing these issues promptly is essential. After all, you want everyone to feel safe to participate and not overshadowed.

Tips for redirecting talkative teens in a group setting.

Effectively redirecting talkative behavior requires a delicate approach. You want everyone in the group to feel good about participating, while also encouraging more balanced participation.

Here are some tips for how to deal with talkative students:

  • Be Gentle: When addressing talkative teens, focus on redirecting rather than stifling their desire to communicate.
  • Reframe Questions: In class or group settings, reframe questions to encourage other participants to share their thoughts. Give talkative teens the opportunity to pass or share.
  • Do Interactive Activities: Incorporate games or activities that require everyone’s participation, ensuring a more balanced conversation.
  • Set Time Limits: Implement time limits for individual contributions, allowing everyone to have a chance to speak.
  • Encourage Others: Politely redirect by saying, “Let’s hear from someone else now!” This subtly guides the conversation to include diverse voices.
  • Have a One-on-One Conversation: Speak to the talkative teen privately, seeking their help in engaging others in the class/group.

Advice for Teens

Empower teens to self-reflect and make conscious choices about their communication style.

  1. Relevance: Encourage teens to evaluate the relevance of their contributions to the ongoing discussion.
  2. Conciseness: Teach teens to share stories in a concise manner, respecting others’ time and attention.
  3. Empathy: Help teens understand how their talking may impact others’ ability to share their thoughts and opinions.
  4. Self-Monitoring: If teens wish to reduce talkativeness, suggest counting the number of times they speak in a class or group and gradually decreasing it.
  5. Use of Tools: Introduce tools like fidget or stress balls as alternatives for teens who struggle with the urge to talk excessively.
By implementing these strategies and fostering open communication, teachers and youth workers can create an inclusive and engaging environment that benefits everyone in the group.

TLDR for Teens

Talking is not bad, but sometimes our words mean more when we say less. Ask yourself:

  • Is this relevant to this discussion?
  • Have I already told this person this story?
  • Can I tell this story more concisely?
  • Is my talking keeping others from being able to share their thoughts

If this is something you want to work on, count how many times you talk in a class or group. Then cut that number by 2 the next time.

You could also use a fidget or stress ball when you want to talk.

Also in this episode:

  • What is the Ahead App and will it really transform your life?
  • Blind boxes and chase figures – what are they and why are they so popular?

In this episode, we mentioned or used the following resources.

Have a question?

If you have a question about something you heard or just want to give us some feedback, please leave us a comment below.  We would love to hear from you!
Karlie Duke
Karlie Duke

Communications Director

Tobin Hodges
Tobin Hodges

Program Director

Caleb Hatchett
Caleb Hatchett

Podcast Host

More Resources You Might Like

Lapse + Meta Lawsuit + Teacher Burnout + Advent
Ep. 119 Diverse Families- Multi-Cultural/Multiracial Families
Episode 27 ; Meditation & Messaging Apps

Kids Fighting at School + Twitch Update + Connection | Ep. 141

Kids Fighting at School + Twitch Update + Connection | Ep. 141

by | Jan 9, 2024 | Parenting, Podcast, School, Social Media

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

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What’s with kids fighting at school and how can we help?

Fighting at school causes problems for students, teachers, and the parents of those involved. It’s easy to write some kids off as “trouble,” but in our experience, the right adult intervention can make a huge difference.

Recent statistics from the Youth Risk Behavior Survey conducted in 2021 shed light on a startling reality: approximately 18.3% of teenagers have been involved in physical altercations, with boys comprising a higher percentage at 23.3%. Even more troubling, 5.8% of these fights took place on school premises, reflecting a tangible threat to the safety and security of educational settings.

Keep reading for more on how schools are handling the problem of fighting and how you can help.

What are the consequences of fighting at school?

The consequences stemming from school fights are severe and far-reaching. Suspension, physical injury, and, in extreme cases, legal repercussions like arrests and felony charges can alter the trajectory of a young person’s life irreversibly. A poignant example is the recent incident in Florida where 11 high school students were arrested for engaging in a violent altercation during school hours, resulting in three students facing felony charges.

What are schools doing about it?

School administrations have implemented various measures aimed at enhancing safety, including the presence of security personnel, surveillance cameras, metal detectors, and zero-tolerance policies. However, the root causes of this issue often extend beyond the school gates.

Why do kids fight?

Underlying factors contributing to school violence are multifaceted. They range from turbulent home environments to feelings of powerlessness in other aspects of life. Difficulty in managing anger and the need for self-defense against bullying also play significant roles in instigating conflicts.

Addressing this complex issue necessitates proactive engagement from adults, especially when observing signs of potential conflict among teens. Initiating non-judgmental conversations, refraining from labeling, and creating a safe and approachable atmosphere are pivotal. Offering support, such as counseling services, and being receptive to troubled youths seeking help are critical steps in mitigating these issues.

(Read more about how Support Groups can make a difference.)

What can caring adults do to help?

For adolescents grappling with anger or engaging in conflicts, alternative strategies exist. Encouraging productive outlets like boxing or providing opportunities for cooling off before confrontation can significantly redirect energies. Seeking professional help to understand the underlying causes of anger is a pivotal step toward resolution.

As adults within the community, it’s essential to foster an environment where communication is encouraged and support is readily available for teens experiencing difficulties. By promoting understanding, intervening early, and offering constructive alternatives, we can collectively steer our youth away from the detrimental repercussions of school violence.

Let’s work together to create safer educational environments and guide our youth toward more constructive means of conflict resolution.

(Learn more about volunteer training to lead Support Groups in middle schools and high schools.)

If you know a teen who is fighting, start a conversation!

  • Ask questions.
  • Don’t assume or label them.
  • Try a reward! Offer their favorite treat or a special privilege for each week they choose not to fight.
  • Believe the best.
  • Be a safe place for students to report potential fights to you.
  • Offer help and counseling services.
  • Encourage them to take up a physical activity like boxing where they can focus their energy.

Sometimes teens and adults have a hard time understanding each other.

Here are a few tips for teens and adults that are sure to improve your communication skills over time.

Adults ask:

How can I connect with teens and get them to open up to me?

  • Be available
  • Be yourself
  • Connect during the good times so you have that background during hard conversations. Look for ways to just have fun with no agenda!

Teens ask:

How can I get the adults in my life to care and not lecture?

  • Be intentional about when you talk to them- especially when you bring up tough topics. A lot of time, their emotional state or reaction isn’t about you! It’s about other things that you might not be aware of.
  • If needed, ask someone to mediate a conversation between you and the adult that you feel frustrated with

Also in this episode:

In this episode, we mentioned or used the following resources.

Have a question?

If you have a question about something you heard or just want to give us some feedback, please leave us a comment below.  We would love to hear from you!

Karlie Duke
Karlie Duke

Communications Director

Tobin Hodges
Tobin Hodges

Program Director

Caleb Hatchett
Caleb Hatchett

Podcast Host

More Resources You Might Like

Helping Teens Struggling in School
The CDC recommends that schools take action to educate teens on improving their mental health. Support Groups are a great solution!
Episode 123: School Partnerships & Fantasy Football

Seasonal Depression + Teens on Mission | Ep. 140

Seasonal Depression + Teens on Mission | Ep. 140

by | Jan 2, 2024 | Mental Health, Podcast

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

 Listen & Subscribe

YouTube

Teens with a purpose, seasonal depression and the best of 2023.

The fall and winter seasons bring more than just chilly weather and cozy holidays. For some, these months usher in a condition known as Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), triggered by reduced daylight. Recognizing the signs is crucial: shifts in mood, energy levels, eating habits, and concentration are all indicative of SAD. But there are ways to combat it.

Maximizing exposure to daylight through walks or special bulbs helps, as does talking about your feelings with friends, family, or a therapist. If you are experiencing symptoms of seasonal depression, you are not alone! Listen for more ways to manage symptoms and get help when you need it.

Amidst these seasonal shifts, finding purpose can be a beacon of light. Encouraging teens to define their missions, whether tackling societal issues or personal growth, becomes vital for mental health. Aligning time and energy with these missions, even if intimidating, fosters resilience. It’s about the journey, not just the destination.

Parents, educators, and mentors can guide this journey by asking teens about their aspirations and supporting them in crafting their missions. After all, it’s never too early to have a mission!

Teens on mission are teens with a purpose

As we dive into the new year, there’s a buzz about resolutions, goals, and plans. But amidst all this, there’s something even more vital to grasp: our ‘why’. And for teens, this ‘why’ often revolves around finding a purpose, a mission that fuels their days with passion and meaning.

So, how do we guide teens in uncovering their purpose? Or better yet, how can we infuse purpose into our families and classrooms?

Let’s start by painting a canvas of possibilities and inviting teens into a story.

It’s about asking those pivotal questions. What issue do they want to tackle? Homelessness, loneliness, insecurity, or maybe unpreparedness? These inquiries open doors to missions—temporary quests that drive change and impact lives.

Missions aren’t etched in stone.

They’re adaptable, and that’s the beauty of it. Having a purpose, however, is the cornerstone of mental health—a compass that guides actions and decisions.

For teens and adults alike, aligning time and energy with your mission or purpose is a golden rule. If it’s a tad scary, well, that’s often a sign that you’re on the right track. The destination is important, but the real magic lies in the journey—the effort and the strides taken toward that goal.

So, what does having a purpose look like for teens?

It’s a kaleidoscope of possibilities. Some examples could be:

  • Love god, love others
  • Learn and have fun
  • Prepare for the future (college, job)
  • Become a better writer
  • Pass the AP test

It’s amazing when teens zero in on the purpose they want to pursue long-term in their lives, but for most, it’s less intimidating to set a short-term goal.

But living on purpose demands strategy.

Ask yourself—what’s needed to accomplish this mission? Sometimes, it means letting go of things that don’t align with the mission’s trajectory. It’s about priorities and focus.

You’re never too young to have a mission. You’re the architect of your future, and a mission is like the blueprint. Want a fun exercise? Picture your life in 5 or 10 years. Where do you see yourself amidst life’s ups and downs?

Helping teens find their purpose is about empowering teens to dream, discover, and conquer. It’s about nurturing a generation driven by intent and passion.

So, parents, educators, mentors—let’s be the guiding stars. Engage in conversations about aspirations, nudging teens toward their missions. It’s a journey, an exploration of self-discovery.

And teens, if you’re feeling a tad lost or uncertain, that’s alright. The path to finding your mission isn’t always straightforward. It’s about trying on different hats, exploring varied interests, and figuring out what truly resonates.

As we embark on this mission-driven journey, remember—it’s not just about reaching the finish line. It’s about the grit, the determination, the stories woven along the way. It’s about waking up each day with a fire in your belly, fueled by purpose.

Let’s champion teens with a purpose. Let’s paint a world where passion meets action, where dreams aren’t just dreams but blueprints for change.

In this episode, we mentioned or used the following resources about seasonal depression and teens on mission.

Have a question?

If you have a question about something you heard or just want to give us some feedback, please leave us a comment below.  We would love to hear from you!
Karlie Duke
Karlie Duke

Communications Director

Tobin Hodges
Tobin Hodges

Program Director

Caleb Hatchett
Caleb Hatchett

Podcast Host